That the highlight of my everyday is a person who barely knows I exist?
That I gain more entertainment from reading Craiglist missed connections than I do from real life conversations?
That I find I have more in common with serial-killing Dexter than I do the people who pass through my everyday life?
That people think it’s appropriate to ask if they can ask me something when they can just ask me something without asking if they can ask me something?
That Bon Iver can suck balls but if you’re in a suicidal state of mind he can change your life?
That I’m going to be 29 in two weeks and the only thing I feel I’ve accomplished in life is the ability to work 80 hour work weeks without shedding any tears?
That I can respond to any text with “Yup” and it somehow always seems appropriate?
That I repeatedly respond to text messages with “Yup” and people still text me?
That I think drinking excessive amounts of alcohol four hours before waking up for work at 4 am is totally appropriate?
That no one who works for me realizes I drank excessive amounts of alcohol a mere 4 hours before I arrived?
That I occasionally sleep with my head at the foot of my bed so when I wake up in the morning I have a split second of questioning where I am in an attempt to feel something different than my everyday?
That a priest hugged me today and I kind of enjoyed it?
That I recently deleted a contact from my phone solely for the use of an emoticon?
That I can say the phrase “suck my face” 27 times a day and I never tire of it?
That the only thing in my iCal is my soon-to-be trip to Breaking Dawn 2?
That we always look down when we should look up?